I was really struggling to connect into what to share today and then looked at where I am in my journey and this came to mind. Something so essential for our well being that we could all do more of.
We are going through such a deep time of transformation and with that the unearthing of very deep, up to now, unconscious patterns, behaviours, programs and conditioning. These energies have been buried inside of us for many lifetimes and are now being brought up to the surface, our conscious awareness, to be seen. This is due to the immense light we are receiving right now which is facilitating this awakening, this internal awareness of the programmes that have been running in the background.
Energy is like water and needs to flow and when it doesn't it behaves like water. Becoming stale and stagnant and over time, like mud. These old old energies are essentially the mud that is starting to be stirred up so that it can start to flow (release) and create a movement inside of us where before there was stagnation and blockages.
As this very dense energy starts its journey of release we can feel this as heaviness in the form of self judgement. Old patterns of self sabotage may reappear or deepen and we can then get caught in a trap of being very hard on ourselves which essentially forces this energy back down.
At the present time, we live in a world dominated by judgement, opinions, criticism, the drive for achievement and a sense of having to try to be the perfect person (whatever that means, lol). We are so used to living in this way that it's very easy to fall into the trap of being this way about our own journey and self development work. I say trap as it's just that. A trap to stop the movement into a lighter way of being, a higher personal frequency where judgement, hardness, striving and all our conditioned ways of being cannot exist.
If you have deep patterns of self sabotage and self judgement (most of us do) it can be very easy to slip into this default mechanism about ourselves, as we start to see the old deep stuff and can project shame, blame and guilt onto ourselves.
Part of our journey is to take the (for some of us) very big step towards being kind to ourselves. As a species, we are going through an immense time, a necessary awakening has to happen and is happening so that we can save this beautiful planet that we have been gifted to live on. This is a journey of clearing lifetimes of negativity that has led us to this point in our history where the dominant energies are greed, power and manipulation, to mention a few. It requires inner strength, tenacity, perseverance and above all a gentleness with ourselves.
I find when I am in a dark heavy place of self judgement and self sabotage (which has been a lot of the time recently) taking a step back and looking at myself and how I am feeling rather that the identification with those feelings helps a lot. This takes practice as they are very familiar feelings and ways of being but having the ability to step back and observe starts to lessen the intensity of them.
Being accepting of patterns and behaviours without judgement. A lot of the time these have been coping mechanisms in our life and so we have to acknowledge that and through that comes acceptance and through that the opportunity for release. The mind tricks us into thinking that if we accept the way we are we will be like that forever. It's actually the acceptance that allows the letting go as we are no longer identified with them. Accepting and identifying are not the same. One initiates flow, the other, stagnation.
I know life can seem overwhelming at times, that we are rushing down the rapids of life with no ability to steer our way but this is all a necessary part of our journey in this life. We all came here at this time to do this work and although it may not seem like it at times, it's a gift. We have the opportunity to clear lifetimes of negativity in this one lifetime.
Also know you are here because you can do this work. Right now, on this planet, every single soul counts, we matter, our personal frequency has a huge impact on the collective as we are a part of the collective. Maybe when that intrusive damaging thought pops in, rather than identifying with it, take an energetic step back and remind yourself just how courageous and empowered you are and that you are on this path, one step at a time. Some steps are flowing and expansive and some are like trudging through the mud and thats ok. Acceptance of everything and ourselves will keep the energy flowing and eventually all the mud has cleared.
Take care of yourself as best you can, no pressure to be "perfect". Life is messy at times and that's ok too.
Many thanks for taking the time to read this,
Meriel